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grey days

i know it seems odd, now that the sun is finally shining                                                                    and we are waking each day to birds chirping through open windows                                            to be talking about the grey days…

but i suppose, that’s how it happens-

sometimes, those grey days are so very dark                                                                                      that it takes all we have                                                                                                                              to get through them                                                                                                                                   and get up… and do it all again

that we don’t realize until we are on the other side

just how

DARK

they were.

my silence here over the past months

has not been for a lack of wanting to write and create                                                                       but day after dreary day                                                                                                                              i found myself

tired, lonely, sad, uninspired, scared…

it’s not pretty.  any of it.  but that it where i’ve been.                                                                  ignoring emails, dodging friend’s phone calls and canceling plans.

not a new england soul was spared of the hell that was winter 2014-15.                                     THAT is true                                                                                                                                                 and i am so very grateful for my little bird, who happily bopped around our kitchen                  day after very. long. day…

she got me up each morning with a smile and we baked, and danced and sang, yes!                 but in the moments of in-between-                                                                                                        the long grey stretches of hours spent in our stale kitchen                                                                  it was then                                                                                                                                                  that my mind wandered and worried and wondered…

i’ve been told, and read and re-read that there is no roadmap for loss and it’s aftermath         that just when you think you’ve pulled yourself together                                                                  you find yourself all unbuttoned-                                                                                                           right in the middle of the grocery store. or a stop light. or your kitchen floor.

it was on this kitchen floor, during one such breakdown, however silent i thought my tears were falling, that my little bird, dug my sneakers from our shoe bin, lugged them over and dropped them in my lap and simply said “SHOOOES, mama!”                                                                               because already, she knew- fresh air and a brisk walk- is just what we needed to snap out of a funk.

and we did it. we got through. we’re getting through…

so… i’m still here, and i hope you are too…                                                                                           because spring now very quickly, summer (!) is here…

                                                                                                                                                                     and this little bird of mine?  we’ve got dreams and hopes and sun and adventures to share…

happygirls xo thank you

red tail hawk captured by christine chitnis, just outside my studio window, december 2014

blanket for my beach babe

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baby blankets.

yes, these days, they do seem to be a dime a dozen- stroller blankets, muslin lovies, craft fair creations are all favorite baby shower go-tos.

we have a pile on emily’s bedroom shelf of these gifted blankies and they just make my heart smile when i walk in the door- the stitches and mix-matched fabric, the knits and purls all made-with-love by family and friends excited to meet our girl.

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unlike my brother, whose “nahnnie” was so loved that all that remains is a few matted shreads and threads (literally! in a ziplock bag!), i was never a “blankie girl”…

 i do still have my mint green baby blanket that my mum stitched for me, with excitement, while i grew inside her.  although it wasn’t my secuirty blanket, it did come with me to boarding school, and college and now sits in that pile of emily’s beautiful blankets.

and it still has that smell. 

that comforting, bring-you-right-back smell of childhood and home…

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i’ve long dreamed of sewing baby blankets for my own babies. that first, special, made-with-love by mama gift…

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so when we discovered that we were having a girl, and a summer babe, at that, i pulled out the double-gauze mermaid fabric i’ve saved for ages.

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i paired it with a few fabrics inherited from my grama’s stash,  some favorites bought over the years at purl and a gorgeous (though INSANELY labor intensive) scallop pattern…

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it’s just perfect.

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just as i’d dreamed.

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here. back, again…

well…
i guess that’s what i went ahead and did-
it’s been nearly 10 months since i’ve checked in here
and i’m not sure if there is anyone still out there
but i do hope so
and i thank you. thank you, for coming back

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the time away has been good to me
so, so very good to me
and i’ve found myself craving a return-
there is so much to share
(and a new look, coming soon
which feels so right and so good)
but for now, i’m ready
for the long over-due
dive back in

cotton

i spotted this over at camp comfort
i love zooey deschanel… i mean, how cute is she!?
her films, style… and here, she sings!
remember her ADORABLE house in domino (tear…)?

even though i don’t love commercials,  i and digging this fresh new take. 
even better that it is for cotton.
now, if only it was ORGANIC.

beach buggy

how awesome is this!? 

seriously… this just may be the best way to beat the parking lines at nauset light on surf days.
finally! a MUCH cooler option for toting multiple kids than those tents on wheels.

Madsen Cycles Cargo Bikes has to take the cake for the best way to get the kids around… and loving that it feels almost like a side-car!

happy easter!

i just returned to providence after a family weekend on the cape for easter. it was wonderful to have spring in the air! 
i arrived a few days before the rest of the family to help my mom with my favorite part- baking and decorating…